Transitions

Transitions can be tough. By definition "transition" means "to change", and if you are anything like me...you hate change. Change has always made me extremely anxious. There are also many types of transitions you could be going through. You could be transitioning to a new school, job, team, or group of friends. Since the new school year has just begun (or about to begin) I think that transitions are a really important thing to start thinking about. 

Whenever I transition into something new I get very nervous, and tense. I feel like I'm not ready. I feel like I'm going to mess up, and not be able to handle it. It's like the weight of the world is on my shoulders. I find that when I transition into a new part of my life self-doubt starts to set in. My personal self-doubt sounds something like this:

Can I do this? I can do this...no I can't do this. What if I mess up? I can't handle this. I'm not as good as these people. Can I do this? I can....'t do this! What if they don't like me? I'm going to fail. Who am I anyway? I don't want to do this anymore. AHHHHHHHH!!!!

Transitions. 

Transitions mean change, and change means something new. When faced with a new transition we sometimes panic because we don't have any experience with it. But that is where confidence comes in. When you have confidence in yourself you can succeed through any transition, because...

1. Confidence means you are willing to work hard
2. Confidence means you are okay with making mistakes, owning them, and learning from them
3. Confidence means you know how talented you are, and that you CAN and WILL be successful
4. Confidence means you stick to your values

When we transition into new lifestyles such as middle school to high school, high school to college, college to a job, or a job to another job, it becomes SO easy to lose sight of who we truly are, and what values we have. When we transition we can feel alone and vulnerable, but hold on to your values. Your values determine your actions, and your actions help develop and determine who you are. Being in a new part of life doesn't mean changing the wonderful things about you. Don't try to fit in to a mold because you want room to grow! 

If you are struggling with a new transition here is what I really want to say to you.

Dear G4G Member,

        Today is your first day of your new transition! You are going to do fantastic. Remember, don’t be intimidated by your boss/teacher because you’re smart. Don’t be intimated by your peers either, because you are an original, and there is no one quite like you. I know it might be scary, and you’re not sure what to expect, but always know that you grow the most when you are out of your comfort zone. Through this experience you will start to find yourself, and see who you truly are. Be the best you can be, and make good choices because they will only benefit you in the long run. “You are braver than you believe, smarter than you seem, and stronger than you think!”GOOD LUCK!!!!

Lots of love,

- G4G and Tinamarie

*What transition are you going through right now? How are doing? How do you cope with it? Comment below!!!! 

 

When Looking At...

There are a few REALLY important things to think about when looking at the way women are portrayed in the media. Especially, when looking at advertisements and covers of magazines. Here are three easy steps to use when analyzing how women are portrayed in a specific ad, TV show, or magazine cover. 

1. Look at the picture

Take a look at the picture and ask yourself these questions: 

Is the woman in the picture...

a) sexualized (she's a sex object and only a sex object)

b) objectified (she's an object: actual object, or sex object. Sometimes both!)

c) dismembered (the focus is on her butt, boobs, or legs. She is seen not as a whole person, but as parts)

If you said yes to any the questions, then the picture alone is portraying women in a negative way. I personally believe that a picture is worth 1,000 words. And there are a TON of advertisements out there that sexualize, objectify, and dismember women. That's a LOT that's being said without actual words.  

*It's also really import to mention is that we are not judging the model as a person! We are analyzing, and thinking about how she is being portrayed. 

1. Look at the words around the picture

Sometimes the picture alone, but it's the words around the picture that cause women to be portrayed in a negative light. 

Does anyone notice the "Red-Hot and Blue" comment on the top left? Or the "Dirtiest jokes, craziest stories, Skimpiest outfits" on the top right? Or what, in my personal opinion, is the most OFFENSIVE comment the "Out of Uniform. Meet the Marines Sexiest Sargent" on the bottom left?

A picture can be seen in different ways, but words have less wiggle room. Ask yourself: What do the words say? What do the words really mean? 

1. Analyze 

Analyzing is last because it puts all the pieces together. You are a smart person, I know you are. It just takes a want to see the way women are portrayed. Once you want to, and once you take some time to analyze, you will be AMAZED about what you can see. 

*Use your knowledge for the better! Help others see what you see! Help other women analyze different types of media, and TOGETHER we can shed some light on the way women are portrayed!      

Love,

G4G and Tinamarie 

Say Good-Bye

A new school year is starting soon, and I just wished my little sister off to college before going back myself. Yes...I'm very sad, BUT even though that good-bye wasn't happy, it's got me thinking about when good-byes are positive. 

I think it might be time to say good-bye. 

Say good-bye to insecurity, self-hate, anxiety, mean comments, anger, jealousy, bad relationships, and anything negative in your life. I am horrible at good-byes (you can ask anyone I graduated high school with). But that's a different kind of good-bye. The kind I'm talking about is more about cleansing. 

Sometimes I feel caught up in my own negativity. It's like I'm sitting in a rain cloud, and everywhere I look I only see the gloominess. When that gloominess sets in, it's time to say (as hard as it may be), "GOOD-BYE NEGATIVE THING, AND DON'T LET THE DOOR HIT YOU ON THE WAY OUT!!!" 

I'm not saying ignore problems because that won't get us anywhere. I'm saying say good-bye to negativity. The only way to conquer negativity is to say good-bye to it. Because when you do, you take back control of the situation.  

There are a whole bunch of ways to do this. I personally do this through prayer. When I sit in the morning and listen to positive music, and read my bible I find that I gain control of my negativity. I try my best to give the negative to God, and deal with the reality of my situation with the strength I regained from that time with God. When I pray I feel like God reminds me of how strong I am. Never forget how strong you are! I also think that talking about it to a friend or family member, and letting all the negativity out helps clear the way. As corny as it might seem, I put Post-Its around my room saying happy things when I want to get rid of a negative thing in life! You could post at G4G's Facebook page or comment below, our community would love to support you in anything you need support though.

At the end of the day, there are three steps to defeating the negativity in life...

Say good-bye, walk away, 

and don't look back. 

Love, 

G4G and Tinamarie  

Olympics!

I love the Olympics! I watch sports that I would never watch any other time (rowing for example!), and I love the inspirational stories of the athletes that come from the Olympics!! But these great games always bring up a timeless debate-- men vs. women athletes. 

There are plenty of women who are amazing, and outstanding athletes. Mia Hamm, Michelle Quan, Serena Williams, and Gabby Douglas are only a few of the best women athletes in history. 

Last year in English class, I was part of a heated discussion about women's athletics. One group said that women were not as good as men, one group said women were as good as men, and one group didn't care. 

As a female athlete myself I was in defense of women. I explained that women were better and could take down any man if they wanted, and they should. A friend of mine (she is a FANTASTIC soccer player) brought up an excellent point that changed by perspective. She said, that her coach would often say if women think that they should be playing with the boys, isn't that saying that other women are not good enough competition?

WOW! I had never thought about that! I had to sit and really think about those words. After looking back and reflecting on my initial thoughts, I realized something. I realized that thought that to prove that I was a great athlete I had to beat a guy. Why wasn't beating a girl good enough? How many times have your heard the worst insult ever, "You play like a girl!" Just look at this clip! 

It was never a good thing to "play like a girl." Girls played with dolls, and boys played baseball, so telling someone they played like a girl was the WORST insult imaginable. Did you see their reaction when he said that? Playing like a girl was worse then being called a jerk, butt sniffer, scab eater, puss licker, and fart smeller.

When I was little I was a tomboy. I could throw a football, and a baseball. (WAIT! Right there! Tomboy! Why was I thought of and called a tomboy, not just thought of as a girl who played and enjoyed sports?) I saw gym class as a way to lead my team to victory during capture the flag. I often reminded my favorite male gym teacher to say "he OR she" when saying things like, "When he or she goes into defense..." and I couldn't stand anyone who didn't want to play as tough as I did. To prove my athleticism I played with the boys. I was a great basketball player because I could keep up, and beat the boys at recess. The key word was prove. If I had to prove my athletic abilities with boys; that meant girls weren't good enough for me to play against. It wasn't about what I could do, it was about who I could beat. I know that it wasn't a conscious thought process or done on purpose, but to me it's a really interesting thing to think about and reflect on.  

The issue here is that as women, we need to hold ourselves to a high standard of athleticism, and ignore gender. Talent is talent, practice is practice, and wins are wins. 

But I have to know what do you think? Do you have any experiences or stories to share?

 Love,

G4G and Tinamarie